Time and again I have had this feeling that I am not destined to a long and ful-filling life and that someday the road that I am walking on will hit a detour. Sometimes the thought that I am holding life by its very tips gets so powerful that it sends chills down my spine. I may be a little too paranoid over here but this recurring thought just had to be penned down. Usually, this feeling is not that strong but tonight it is strong enough to be given some form.
It all started with a few sneezes in the evening, and subsequent body ache a few hours later. I knew that I was coming down with something so, I decided to call it a day at around 11. After about 3 hours of intermittent sleep, I just could not take it anymore and had to get up. While I was trying my best to fall asleep, my sub-conscious was busy writing this post. So, I decided to give sleep a pass and do justice to what my sub-conscious had conjured.
To my surprise, my sub-conscious turned out to be an even greater Methodist than me. It had planned for every eventuality. Should something happen in the middle of the night who was I to call, whose number did I dialled last, Was he a sound sleeper or not, Will he understand the meaning of a blank call at the middle of the night etc. etc. ... (For the record, last dialled number was that of Mohrana who I believe was actually my best shot)
Thought after thought...it was like the spillway of the 3 gorges coming apart...And so came the next surge...The scene shifts from my room to a ward. Who all will be by my side??.... A simple question...with some simple answers. For all that I knew, there would be a handful. The pain started to fade away. I was at ease now, for I knew, come what may, there will always be people by my side, there will always be "Get Well Soon" messages in my Inbox and that there will always be flowers, Cards and Fruit-Baskets on my side-table.
This was followed by the very obvious thought of things left undid and words left unsaid.There was so much that I wanted to say, so many things that I wanted to do. I always cursed myself for being an under-achiever, for being the stand-out example of Jack of all trades, and then my eyes fell upon the Cards, the flowers, the fruit -baskets, and I realised that life hadn`t been that bad after all....
You ask me what have I achieved in my 22 years of existence...well If on some unfortunate day things do get out of hands....just look around my bed...and you will have your answer.
P.S.- For those who are all tears by now, and are cursing me for writing this....with all probability...it`s just some viral infection...
Monday, August 9, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
"Nobody Knows...." - Guest Post
HOWDY PEOPLE!!!
Its football season again!!!....and I have nothing but the Cup on my mind. Now that my thoughts are fairly confined between the two posts and since, you have already been given an overdose of football in my last write up, I decided to try something different here. So, I give to you all, a short romantic poem by a guest writer. Now, before you read the poem, let me tell you that this guy is amongst the most unromantic of people you could come across, so I really wonder how he came up with this on the first place(I suppose, love does bring out the poet inside you). Apparently, its based on his true life experiences. A little syrupy, but a great piece of work nonetheless.
Ankit Jhanwar
Can't read a thing??....Try clicking on the image.. :)
Its football season again!!!....and I have nothing but the Cup on my mind. Now that my thoughts are fairly confined between the two posts and since, you have already been given an overdose of football in my last write up, I decided to try something different here. So, I give to you all, a short romantic poem by a guest writer. Now, before you read the poem, let me tell you that this guy is amongst the most unromantic of people you could come across, so I really wonder how he came up with this on the first place(I suppose, love does bring out the poet inside you). Apparently, its based on his true life experiences. A little syrupy, but a great piece of work nonetheless.
Ankit Jhanwar
Can't read a thing??....Try clicking on the image.. :)
Monday, June 7, 2010
Life on the Edge…..and Beyond
A prodigious player followed by an ignominious star followed by an outspoken coach, the life of Diego Armando Maradona has come full circle. His accomplishments as a footballer are rivaled only by the controversies that always seem to surround him. His life has been like a pendulum oscillating between fame and shame. Come to think of it, Argentina’s match against England in the ‘86 semis can be considered as an abridged version of Diego’s life. From the infamous “Hand of God” to the stunning “Goal of the century”, El Pelusa has always lived a life of extremes. And now that he is back at the helm of the team he once led to world cup glory, get ready for another round of hysterical antics and theatrics.
So, what does it actually take to be the Coach of the Argentine football team?? (Apart from a coaching license and experience obviously). The coach of a national team is expected to be courageous, tactical and liberal. He should be free-spirited and should have the ability to reproduce results game after game. He should be good in addressing people and handling the media. And most importantly, he should have a never say die attitude and the ability to hit back and rise to the occasion.
Now, let us see as to why Diego Maradona is the man for the job.
Courage-It requires shear guts to drop players like Cambiasso and Zanetti from the squad, and even more guts to even consider restricting Milito (whose form over the past one year has been mind boggling to say the least) to the bench.
Free-Spirited and Liberal- Maradona is undoubtedly the most eccentric character to have ever walked the green turf. His promise for a streak through the streets of Buenos Aires on winning the Cup is a testimony to this. As for being liberal, to come up with an official approval for the players to have sex during the cup is as liberal as it gets considering the fact that the Brazilian squad has been thrown into isolation by Coach Dunga.
Reproducing Results- First for Cocaine in 1991 and then for Ephedrine in 1994, both resulting in him being sent packing. Needless to say, this guy surely knows how to reproduce the same results.
Addressing people and Handling Media- It took the “Special One” 7 years, two Portuguese liga titles, two premiership titles, two Serie A titles and two UEFA champions league before he was assured of a place on the cover pages of top magazines and newspapers. Compare this with Coach Maradona’s rise to tabloid stardom. Even after a string of loses and a close call in the qualifiers, Maradona is yet to see the inside cover. His highly verbal post-match press conference after the game with Uruguay could have easily been the last nail to the coffin, but on the contrary it just escalated him to even greater heights of Press popularity. Media management just couldn’t get any better.
Ability to bounce back- Cocaine Addiction, Bankruptcy, Obesity…you name it, this man has seen it all. To fight against all odds and be selected as the Head Coach of the Argentine National Team is truly a display of Diego’s fighting spirit and the fact that this man just doesn’t know when to give up.
Clearly, Argentina couldn’t have asked for a better replacement for Coach Basile. That being said, we can only hope for Diego’s men to deliver the goods when it matters the most, even if it results in a freak streak. However, only time will tell as to how the world will remember Coach Maradona-an overhyped and underperforming loudmouth, or the man who led Argentina to two world cup glories.
So, what does it actually take to be the Coach of the Argentine football team?? (Apart from a coaching license and experience obviously). The coach of a national team is expected to be courageous, tactical and liberal. He should be free-spirited and should have the ability to reproduce results game after game. He should be good in addressing people and handling the media. And most importantly, he should have a never say die attitude and the ability to hit back and rise to the occasion.
Now, let us see as to why Diego Maradona is the man for the job.
Courage-It requires shear guts to drop players like Cambiasso and Zanetti from the squad, and even more guts to even consider restricting Milito (whose form over the past one year has been mind boggling to say the least) to the bench.
Free-Spirited and Liberal- Maradona is undoubtedly the most eccentric character to have ever walked the green turf. His promise for a streak through the streets of Buenos Aires on winning the Cup is a testimony to this. As for being liberal, to come up with an official approval for the players to have sex during the cup is as liberal as it gets considering the fact that the Brazilian squad has been thrown into isolation by Coach Dunga.
Reproducing Results- First for Cocaine in 1991 and then for Ephedrine in 1994, both resulting in him being sent packing. Needless to say, this guy surely knows how to reproduce the same results.
Addressing people and Handling Media- It took the “Special One” 7 years, two Portuguese liga titles, two premiership titles, two Serie A titles and two UEFA champions league before he was assured of a place on the cover pages of top magazines and newspapers. Compare this with Coach Maradona’s rise to tabloid stardom. Even after a string of loses and a close call in the qualifiers, Maradona is yet to see the inside cover. His highly verbal post-match press conference after the game with Uruguay could have easily been the last nail to the coffin, but on the contrary it just escalated him to even greater heights of Press popularity. Media management just couldn’t get any better.
Ability to bounce back- Cocaine Addiction, Bankruptcy, Obesity…you name it, this man has seen it all. To fight against all odds and be selected as the Head Coach of the Argentine National Team is truly a display of Diego’s fighting spirit and the fact that this man just doesn’t know when to give up.
Clearly, Argentina couldn’t have asked for a better replacement for Coach Basile. That being said, we can only hope for Diego’s men to deliver the goods when it matters the most, even if it results in a freak streak. However, only time will tell as to how the world will remember Coach Maradona-an overhyped and underperforming loudmouth, or the man who led Argentina to two world cup glories.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
The Long Way Back
There were still a good 3-4 weeks of my internship left when I started thinking about my journey back home. First the hunt for an internship and then the internship itself kept me from planning my return.But now that I had settled down nicely at Delhi I decided to get to work.
It was only when I sat down to make the reservations did a thought strike me for the first time.....How the hell do I get back home intact and breathing!! With all that's going around in this country the best possible way would have been teleportation, but since there is still some time before that is included in the category of public transport I had to think of a more reasonable way. I had my eyes set on a morning flight for the 21st of June. A morning flight implied that I would be home in time for lunch with mom and dad, for the first time after about 5-6 months. The plan seemed perfect. When...Mangalore happened. A relatively new IA jet overshot the runway, fell into a ditch and burst into flames. The worst part is even after a week of investigation they could not find out whether it was a human error or an equipment failure which led to the crash.Whatever the reason might be, 158 people lost their lives. Since then, not a single day passed when I didn't hear about something or the other happening to a passenger Jet. Tyre bursts, runway overshoots and landing gear malfunctions started appearing like regular columns in newspapers. And with the so called economy airlines almost at the verge of shutting down engines mid-flight to save fuel and further economise the whole process...I decided to give air travel a pass. Somehow a 32 hour train journey was making all the more sense now. So, the reservation was made for the 21st of June.The constant sight of solid ground was definitely going to be reassuring.I was at peace now...assured of a safe journey back home and then....Jhargram happened.I was shattered to say the least...shattered by the death toll, by the carnage....and by the fact that all it took was unscrewing a few nuts and removing a little strip of the track. Indian Railways has been no stranger to collisions and derailments...but this was different.....this was mass murder.From attacking wealthy landlords and politicians to such indiscriminate killing, the Naxalite movement had come full circle.
Suddenly, like a bolt from the blue, things started coming back to me.Firozabad, Khanna, Mumbai, Godhra....it was like a series of unfortunate events. An article on Wikipedia exclusively dedicated to Indian Rail incidents was a testimony to its safety standards! It had an entry for almost every year for the past 50 years!!.Indian Railways my #$$....it was death on wheels!!!...like a moving time bomb just ticking away..
How the hell did I miss that!! I felt so stupid...hoping for a safe journey on a medium which served for the last journey of more than 10,000 people in the last decade itself.And then an even greater realisation....my journey back home would be through the epicentre of the Naxalite movement.This is definitely not what I had planned...I was cornered...with nowhere to go.I was left wondering that if by some gods grace the Indian railways don't screw me up....some extremist wacko surely will.
Some time has passed since I had that panic attack and am back to my senses now. I think I might have over reacted a little there. All the hysteria was probably because of the excitement of going back home.Anyway, the ticket still lies there on my table....reminding me at every instant, that life is really really unpredictable and that teleportation is still not feasible.
It was only when I sat down to make the reservations did a thought strike me for the first time.....How the hell do I get back home intact and breathing!! With all that's going around in this country the best possible way would have been teleportation, but since there is still some time before that is included in the category of public transport I had to think of a more reasonable way. I had my eyes set on a morning flight for the 21st of June. A morning flight implied that I would be home in time for lunch with mom and dad, for the first time after about 5-6 months. The plan seemed perfect. When...Mangalore happened. A relatively new IA jet overshot the runway, fell into a ditch and burst into flames. The worst part is even after a week of investigation they could not find out whether it was a human error or an equipment failure which led to the crash.Whatever the reason might be, 158 people lost their lives. Since then, not a single day passed when I didn't hear about something or the other happening to a passenger Jet. Tyre bursts, runway overshoots and landing gear malfunctions started appearing like regular columns in newspapers. And with the so called economy airlines almost at the verge of shutting down engines mid-flight to save fuel and further economise the whole process...I decided to give air travel a pass. Somehow a 32 hour train journey was making all the more sense now. So, the reservation was made for the 21st of June.The constant sight of solid ground was definitely going to be reassuring.I was at peace now...assured of a safe journey back home and then....Jhargram happened.I was shattered to say the least...shattered by the death toll, by the carnage....and by the fact that all it took was unscrewing a few nuts and removing a little strip of the track. Indian Railways has been no stranger to collisions and derailments...but this was different.....this was mass murder.From attacking wealthy landlords and politicians to such indiscriminate killing, the Naxalite movement had come full circle.
Suddenly, like a bolt from the blue, things started coming back to me.Firozabad, Khanna, Mumbai, Godhra....it was like a series of unfortunate events. An article on Wikipedia exclusively dedicated to Indian Rail incidents was a testimony to its safety standards! It had an entry for almost every year for the past 50 years!!.Indian Railways my #$$....it was death on wheels!!!...like a moving time bomb just ticking away..
How the hell did I miss that!! I felt so stupid...hoping for a safe journey on a medium which served for the last journey of more than 10,000 people in the last decade itself.And then an even greater realisation....my journey back home would be through the epicentre of the Naxalite movement.This is definitely not what I had planned...I was cornered...with nowhere to go.I was left wondering that if by some gods grace the Indian railways don't screw me up....some extremist wacko surely will.
Some time has passed since I had that panic attack and am back to my senses now. I think I might have over reacted a little there. All the hysteria was probably because of the excitement of going back home.Anyway, the ticket still lies there on my table....reminding me at every instant, that life is really really unpredictable and that teleportation is still not feasible.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
The Hopeless Romantic
The past few years have been a series of leaps and bounds for me as far as romance is concerned. There were moments which I will cherish for the rest of my life, and there were moments which I am still trying to get over. But amidst all this there was one thing which remained unchanged, constant accusations by those around me about my ways. This one is basically to hit back at all those who find my ways weird, who accuse me of going overboard with my quest.
Being the Methodist that I am, have taken the pain of making a list of a few of the accusations, followed by my take on the accusations:
1)That my style is very unconventional(sickening):
So, my ways are a little unorthodox....uniqueness has its own charm, does it not?? and I don`t think they have manual for the do`s and don`t`s of wooing a gal. In any case, a hit in 2 attempts (including 2 half chances) ain`t that bad eh?? As far as my last attempt goes....guys.....it was election time in the campus, all of us seek inspiration from whats happening around us, and I guess all the “Poli” somehow got to my head. :)
2)That I am ready to commit at the drop of a hat:
Okay...I am a little commitophilic, but at 22....who isn’t :P ; and most girls usually crave for a guy who is ready to commit, just that somehow they have eluded me so far
3)That I am a stalker:
The lamest accusation of all, stalking is an art and I am too mechanical for such levels of creativity. On the contrary I have a habit of faking complete disinterest in the girl....as if I am disgusted by her very sight.
4)That I aspire(and in some cases end-up with)the wrong(incompatible) girls:
Chris set out in search of India, found America....and still made his way into the history books, I mean the moron didn’t even get the continent right and yet is among the most admired of explorers. Point is...girlfriends, like discoveries, are never right or wrong, it’s always considered an accomplishment.
5)That I behave like an ass when I am with my date:
Tom Cruise at Oprah Winfrey`s Show......need I say more??
6)That I take the “Love at first sight” thingie too seriously:
Complete Crap....My pursuit usually begins after a whole lot of first sights.In fact in some cases the “sightseeing” goes on for up to a year.
By now, I hope most of you are convinced that my ways aren’t half as bad as you thought, and are unique in their own way. This post will serve its purpose if even a single one of the readers starts sharing my vision.
Call me desperate...Call me insensitive.....rest assured...you haven’t heard the last from the hopeless romantic......
P.S.-Special thanks to Rajat Sharma, Christopher Columbus and his entire crew on board Santa Maria
Being the Methodist that I am, have taken the pain of making a list of a few of the accusations, followed by my take on the accusations:
1)That my style is very unconventional(sickening):
So, my ways are a little unorthodox....uniqueness has its own charm, does it not?? and I don`t think they have manual for the do`s and don`t`s of wooing a gal. In any case, a hit in 2 attempts (including 2 half chances) ain`t that bad eh?? As far as my last attempt goes....guys.....it was election time in the campus, all of us seek inspiration from whats happening around us, and I guess all the “Poli” somehow got to my head. :)
2)That I am ready to commit at the drop of a hat:
Okay...I am a little commitophilic, but at 22....who isn’t :P ; and most girls usually crave for a guy who is ready to commit, just that somehow they have eluded me so far
3)That I am a stalker:
The lamest accusation of all, stalking is an art and I am too mechanical for such levels of creativity. On the contrary I have a habit of faking complete disinterest in the girl....as if I am disgusted by her very sight.
4)That I aspire(and in some cases end-up with)the wrong(incompatible) girls:
Chris set out in search of India, found America....and still made his way into the history books, I mean the moron didn’t even get the continent right and yet is among the most admired of explorers. Point is...girlfriends, like discoveries, are never right or wrong, it’s always considered an accomplishment.
5)That I behave like an ass when I am with my date:
Tom Cruise at Oprah Winfrey`s Show......need I say more??
6)That I take the “Love at first sight” thingie too seriously:
Complete Crap....My pursuit usually begins after a whole lot of first sights.In fact in some cases the “sightseeing” goes on for up to a year.
By now, I hope most of you are convinced that my ways aren’t half as bad as you thought, and are unique in their own way. This post will serve its purpose if even a single one of the readers starts sharing my vision.
Call me desperate...Call me insensitive.....rest assured...you haven’t heard the last from the hopeless romantic......
P.S.-Special thanks to Rajat Sharma, Christopher Columbus and his entire crew on board Santa Maria
Monday, November 2, 2009
The Intruder
Ever wondered what life would be like if somehow your dreams were forced to follow the constraints of the real world.If suddenly....they became more real than reality itself and completely lose their inherent ability to defy the laws of physics...as if you were forced to serve a kingdom, you once were at the helm of....
For as long as I can remember I have had this habit of running into the confines of my fantasy world whenever I am down and out.I have used this as an antidote to counter life's atrocities.Its a belief that may be....may be when I wake up, everything will fall in place and I will be on my way again.And strangely, I have come up with solutions....very CREATIVE solutions...for mankind's(and my own) greatest problems, with my eyes closed, till recently when something really weird started to happen.A few weeks ago, I dozed off while watching a documentary on MAGLEVS (wonder why we need magnetism to levitate when we have wingardium leviosa) and before I knew it, I was on board one cruising at 350 kph through lush green fields in west germany with the sun slowly disappearing below the horizon to my left.It was beautiful....so serene.....I was at the verge of absolute tranquility when suddenly I heard screeching...and BAM!!!....the train tumbled down the ramp,into a ditch and burst into flames.I woke up dazed and perspiring...in a rickety bus...going somewhere...I was utterly perplexed to say the least.How did I get there??Where was I heading to?? The road, the shops..they all seemed so familiar and before I could come up with an answer, I saw it....standing tall...the way she has been standing for the past 100 odd years...our very own century gate.This was where I was suppose to get down, but I did not want to.I got to the door...and hesitated....a gentle shove from the back was all that was needed to make sure that I got down at my stop.Well, all that I can recall after that is a half somersault, a loud thud and excruciating pain.Next thing, I was surrounded by a huddle of professors....laughing....enjoying every bit of my agony(the way they have been doing for the past 2 years).I woke up with a jolt......for a second time.....and pinched myself to ensure that this was the final wake up call.I wiped my face and the sweat off my forehead, the perspiration was even more profuse this time.Somehow,2 years at iitr had managed to suck the life out of my dreams.Being the optimist that I am...I thought that it was a one off thing and went back to sleep.And to my utter despair, the same thing happened again.I just could not leave the premises of the campus, as if Lord Thomson himself was conspiring to curb my imagination and keep my thoughts imprisoned within these 365 acres we call iitr.The same thing happened the following day.My dreams were getting more realisitic by the day, in fact I was virtually dreaming reality!!.I started cutting down on my virtual expenses.I had lost my fictitious guts of maintaining full on eye contacts with "people"(I called it my STAREway to Heaven).Virtual conveyance took a beating too....maranellos and ducatis were a thing of the past and the best that I could manage now was a BSA Photon.The pain and suffering of this world had somehow managed to break the reality-fantasy continuum and infringe into my only abode.Its been a month since...and I still dream with my feet firmly on the ground...MODESTY REDEFINED huh!!!.I always knew that our dreams where subjected to the "TRICKLE DOWN" effect i.e. what we see and do here finds its way there, but isn`t this taking it too far??
Anyways....I have no other option but to continue living this depleted life....devoid of the single most important thing which our sub-conscious has to offer, the thing which infuses ambition into the most unambitious of people, the thing which instills hope into the hopeless, and above all, THE most potent troubleshooter that we have at our disposal.Nevertheless, amidst all this I have learned something, that this is not a one way street, with only "Dreams coming true", can work the other way round too(something for the oneirologists to think about).Sadly, there`s not much that I can do to bail myself out of this soup.All I can do is take my time , and hope that I will rediscover my single-most important ability and the fancy sports cars and trendy bikes will run free again.Finally, I would like to thank the Everly Brothers for giving me such a good insight on dreams(although the song only made matters worse) and of course a special vote of thanks to Aerosmith ...for urging me to DREAM ON!!!
For as long as I can remember I have had this habit of running into the confines of my fantasy world whenever I am down and out.I have used this as an antidote to counter life's atrocities.Its a belief that may be....may be when I wake up, everything will fall in place and I will be on my way again.And strangely, I have come up with solutions....very CREATIVE solutions...for mankind's(and my own) greatest problems, with my eyes closed, till recently when something really weird started to happen.A few weeks ago, I dozed off while watching a documentary on MAGLEVS (wonder why we need magnetism to levitate when we have wingardium leviosa) and before I knew it, I was on board one cruising at 350 kph through lush green fields in west germany with the sun slowly disappearing below the horizon to my left.It was beautiful....so serene.....I was at the verge of absolute tranquility when suddenly I heard screeching...and BAM!!!....the train tumbled down the ramp,into a ditch and burst into flames.I woke up dazed and perspiring...in a rickety bus...going somewhere...I was utterly perplexed to say the least.How did I get there??Where was I heading to?? The road, the shops..they all seemed so familiar and before I could come up with an answer, I saw it....standing tall...the way she has been standing for the past 100 odd years...our very own century gate.This was where I was suppose to get down, but I did not want to.I got to the door...and hesitated....a gentle shove from the back was all that was needed to make sure that I got down at my stop.Well, all that I can recall after that is a half somersault, a loud thud and excruciating pain.Next thing, I was surrounded by a huddle of professors....laughing....enjoying every bit of my agony(the way they have been doing for the past 2 years).I woke up with a jolt......for a second time.....and pinched myself to ensure that this was the final wake up call.I wiped my face and the sweat off my forehead, the perspiration was even more profuse this time.Somehow,2 years at iitr had managed to suck the life out of my dreams.Being the optimist that I am...I thought that it was a one off thing and went back to sleep.And to my utter despair, the same thing happened again.I just could not leave the premises of the campus, as if Lord Thomson himself was conspiring to curb my imagination and keep my thoughts imprisoned within these 365 acres we call iitr.The same thing happened the following day.My dreams were getting more realisitic by the day, in fact I was virtually dreaming reality!!.I started cutting down on my virtual expenses.I had lost my fictitious guts of maintaining full on eye contacts with "people"(I called it my STAREway to Heaven).Virtual conveyance took a beating too....maranellos and ducatis were a thing of the past and the best that I could manage now was a BSA Photon.The pain and suffering of this world had somehow managed to break the reality-fantasy continuum and infringe into my only abode.Its been a month since...and I still dream with my feet firmly on the ground...MODESTY REDEFINED huh!!!.I always knew that our dreams where subjected to the "TRICKLE DOWN" effect i.e. what we see and do here finds its way there, but isn`t this taking it too far??
Anyways....I have no other option but to continue living this depleted life....devoid of the single most important thing which our sub-conscious has to offer, the thing which infuses ambition into the most unambitious of people, the thing which instills hope into the hopeless, and above all, THE most potent troubleshooter that we have at our disposal.Nevertheless, amidst all this I have learned something, that this is not a one way street, with only "Dreams coming true", can work the other way round too(something for the oneirologists to think about).Sadly, there`s not much that I can do to bail myself out of this soup.All I can do is take my time , and hope that I will rediscover my single-most important ability and the fancy sports cars and trendy bikes will run free again.Finally, I would like to thank the Everly Brothers for giving me such a good insight on dreams(although the song only made matters worse) and of course a special vote of thanks to Aerosmith ...for urging me to DREAM ON!!!
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